I have feelings. They are not easily hurt but they have been bruised too many times to count. They have learned to guard themselves. They have been taught that loving someone doesn’t solve all problems. They have been shown that vulnerability often leads to fear, loss, pain, lies, abuse and betrayal. That 100% trust is …
So, you’ve decided to dip your toes into group sex? OR you have before but are hoping to increase the odds of a positive experience? OR you just are curious AF? I’ve got you. Here are my Top 20 Tips for Great Group Sex! 1. Don’t hoard someone’s time and body (unless this is a …
Don’t get me wrong. Everything I did for my family, giving help where I could and the visits – it’s all part of a life well lived – and what anyone would do, and I would do it all again. I NEED to be able to be there for others too, if I’m able at all. I don’t blame them or resent them for anything. I love them and am so grateful for them and have no regrets. My symptoms are just part of my new normal now that I have to live with.
Usually one hears “I’m Ambiamorous because I can be HAPPY in either mono or poly relationships” – and bless them for having that experience. At first glance, the term made sense intellectually (just looking at my history) but it didn’t quite resonate emotionally. I do feel happy…SOMETIMES… and I also experience SOME level of discomfort in ALL of my relationships much of the time.
Yes. Mono/Poly or consensually non-monogamous relationships CAN work. However, many people don’t believe so. Even some polyamorous authors like Kathy Labriola, author of The Jealousy Workbook, don’t think they work. Kathy claims “mono/poly relationships are doomed” . Why do they think mono/poly relationships are “doomed”? Because there’s misalignment in needs and values. Monogamy SEEMS to …
You’ve probably heard of Cognitive Dissonance which is the discomfort we feel when we have two conflicting thoughts or a conflict between beliefs and actions. For example, you care about the environment, but you use plastic bags. You may have a general feeling of discomfort or may even feel angry with yourself, but do it …
What is Personal Dissonance & Why Do We Need It? Read More »
by Leanne Million (as written for http://www.nomorewetspot.com – click on the link and check out their absorbent blanket!) “Oops , I think I wet the bed,” I said and made a mental note to wash the pillow underneath me afterwards. I was a little embarrassed but we carried on, and I was still as into …
NOTE: Personally, I prefer the term “condition” to “illness” as it helps me feel less “ill”. For the purpose of this piece, I’ll use both as for many people they feel more in alignment with “illness”. For the purpose of awareness, please note, these include physical and mental health conditions. Being in a relationship with …
Managing Chronic Illness/Conditions in a Relationship Read More »
I do a lot of support work online for the Polyamorous and Consensually Non-monogamous communities. This body of this was written in response to a post (see graphic below) that received a lot of enthusiastic support, and while the concept may be true to an extent, it does miss the mark for me. Adversity and …
I don’t see much value from the notion of “in order to love another you must first love yourself”. It’s a cute catch phrase and I get it’s intention is to promote work on self-esteem and worth (which is entirely valid and I don’t intend to dispute its importance), but I actually see this as …
