Self-help Tools

What DO You Do? A Chronicle of the Last Six Years

Don’t get me wrong. Everything I did for my family, giving help where I could and the visits – it’s all part of a life well lived – and what anyone would do, and I would do it all again. I NEED to be able to be there for others too, if I’m able at all. I don’t blame them or resent them for anything. I love them and am so grateful for them and have no regrets. My symptoms are just part of my new normal now that I have to live with.

Being Ambiamorous: Part Poly, Part Mono

Usually one hears “I’m Ambiamorous because I can be HAPPY in either mono or poly relationships” – and bless them for having that experience. At first glance, the term made sense intellectually (just looking at my history) but it didn’t quite resonate emotionally. I do feel happy…SOMETIMES… and I also experience SOME level of discomfort in ALL of my relationships much of the time.

Are There Successful Mono/Poly Relationships?

Yes. Mono/Poly or consensually non-monogamous relationships CAN work. However, many people don’t believe so. Even some polyamorous authors like Kathy Labriola, author of The Jealousy Workbook, don’t think they work. Kathy claims “mono/poly relationships are doomed” . Why do they think mono/poly relationships are “doomed”? Because there’s misalignment in needs and values. Monogamy SEEMS to …

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What is Personal Dissonance & Why Do We Need It?

You’ve probably heard of Cognitive Dissonance which is the discomfort we feel when we have two conflicting thoughts or a conflict between beliefs and actions. For example, you care about the environment, but you use plastic bags. You may have a general feeling of discomfort or may even feel angry with yourself, but do it …

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Managing Chronic Illness/Conditions in a Relationship

NOTE: Personally, I prefer the term “condition” to “illness” as it helps me feel less “ill”. For the purpose of this piece, I’ll use both as for many people they feel more in alignment with “illness”. For the purpose of awareness, please note, these include physical and mental health conditions. Being in a relationship with …

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